"I’ll put them all in armbars and give them a left, then a right!"
— Jade, 5yo, with sudden bravado AFTER her first jiu-jitsu class
"Dad, you look fancy… like a girl. Heh heh."
— Jade, 5yo
Take It For Yourself
Jade declared that her band name is “Take It For Yourself” then proceeded to dance around a microphone stand belting out a song she made up.
- Drum Teacher: Jade, have you heard of Adele?
- Jade: You mean that girl on the radio that makes me want to kill myself?
- Drum Teacher: ...
- Drum Teacher: Ok. Nevermind, we'll find another song.
"My mom treats me like I’m 9 years old… It’s weird."
— Jade, 4yo, on having to put away her books
"Adele is on the radio! … I’m starting to think that life is over."
— Jade, 4yo, absolutely hates Adele and her sad songs.
"Where did all the happiness go?"
— Jade, 4yo, looking at the rainy skies.
"I’ve finally found proof! Magick is real!"
— Jade, 4yo, after dad spins a hula hoop across the floor so it returns back while pretending to “command” the hula hoop to return.
"Fart! …there was a bubble in my butt and it just popped!"
— Jade, 4yo
"If you’re not fancy, you’re probably like mom or dad."
— Jade, 4yo
"I’m sorry to have to tell you but you have guts for brains."
— Jade, 4yo, playing doctor
- Jade: Don't mess with me!
- Daddy: Why?
- Jade: Because I'm electricity!
